Playable Characters

Johnny Blood
Johnny Blood is a time travelling gypsy musician from New South Wales, Australia. He was born in the year 2019 but went back to 1970 to fight in the Vietnam war and gather inspiration for his album based upon brutal racism to commemorate the reign of facist dictator Donald Trump.

Johnny came to the farm by accident when his time machine malfunctioned while he was travelling back to the future and he ended up on the unkown dimensional plane of existance that the farm occupies.

Johnny's combat experience helped him earn the trust of The Farmer, who promised to help him repair his broken time machine if he helps to fend of the monsters from the farm.

Lando Bacon
The lesser known cousin of Kevin Bacon, Lando Bacon, had struggles when trying to get into the acting business because of his affiliation with the Church of Scientology, so he decided to persue an academic career.

After graduating from New York University with a second class degree in biological engineering, Lando wished to further his education with a PhD. A well sought after placement was for an animal behavior research assistant at the farm. Hundreds were applying for the chance to work with the prestigeous biologist and zoologist The Farmer, however Lando's application stood out among the others because of his experience with both heavy farming machinery and millitary grade combat rifles.

Lando works on writing his thesis between fighting off hoardes of unearthly boar-like creatures on the farm.

Creaky Skelly
Creaky Skelly was once the greatest assassin on Skeletos, the Skeleton homeworld, where he served the great Skeleton King in secret during the Third Great Skeletal War (SWIII).

Following the King's grand ressurection into a ghostly wraith form there was great dispute among Skeleton nobility. Creaky Skelly could no longer stand by the Wraith King after he abandoned his superior Skeleton form in the Holy Blizzard, and joined the anti-Wraith resistance led by the courageous Skeletor.

The Skeletos Civil War was concluded with the overwhelming victory of the Wraith empire over the resistance and Creaky Skelly was banished from the homeworld along with the rest of the surviving members of the anti-Wraith high command.

Wandering the galaxy with no ultimate goal, commanding the resistance flagship The Skullmandy, Creaky Skelly was contemplating skelecide, until one lonely, boney night in his private quarters the entire ship shook heavily. It soon became apparent that The Skullmandy had come too close to a black hole and was being drawn in by it's immense gravitational pull. Creaky Skelly thought that these were his last moments but all of a sudden he found himself the sole survivor of his ship which had crashed onto unknown territory that he found later to be the farm.

Searching for a new purpose in his miserable life, Creaky Skelly pledged his new allegiance to The Farmer, as he found him to be very knowledgable of Skeleton culture and claims to have once visited the planet of Skeletos.

Creaky Skelly's Top Hat of Pestilence and Cigar of Enlightenment are predicted to be tradable cosmetics that can be purchased in game through microtransactions to be added in late 2016.

Daisy Dee
Sole heir of the Jewish Galactic Empire, Daisy Dee is an Israeli born Warhammer 40,000 enthusiast. She often refers to her favourite hobby as the guiding hand that led her to be the great tactician she is today which resulted in her promotion to an Admiral of the Eastern Fleet, which roams and controls two thirds of all systems in the Milky Way.

Since she has never been in actual combat that did not involved the command of mile long spaceships, Daisy Dee decided to silence the jokes and rumours of her weakness throughtout the empire by taking up a job offering on the notoriously dangerous Farm to prove herself worthy of the throne she is to be crowned upon.

The Farmer was pleased to have such a well known combatant working on his farm and hoped that Daisy Dee's presence would attract more than the crazy weirdos working for him just becuase they randomly found themselves there with nothing else to do.

Dead Viking
The origin of Dead Viking is unclear though it is believed that he was among or at least decendent of the first men to walk the planes of the Boar Dimension, who defied the cruel enivironment and built a human settlement. This settlement was named Fårehm, or the Farm as it's referred to today. After centuries of decadent existence, the first men were forced to move on from the Farm for the sake of their families but, however, for some unkown reason, did not want to abandon the Farm completely. Some have spectulated that they saw it as a strategic outpost. The small group of men left to guard the Farm became known as Men of the Farm.

The first men came from a religious background of a mix between Nordic and African traditions. This not only enabled them to use voodoo magic to plague their enemies' homes with lightning storms (though many believe this to be untrue), they could also supposedly achieve true immortality of the soul. Unlike Skelton immortality, this blessing had to be gained in life by pleasing the Great Spirit Lords, Stroud and Kantorovich. Though Dead Viking is evidence to this claim of immortality, there is still no solid proof that what is dead may never die and that members of the first men's religon could indeed become immortal.

Dead Viking himself does not reveal such things but trans-dimensional archaeologists have translated readings of these events from runes carved into shrunken heads buried beneath various structures on the Farm.

The Farmer
"The names Mcree".